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Bend was great, but being back is requiring quite a difficult adjustment.
Unfinished business, letters unread and to-do lists, both news and memories to absorb and to ponder all add up to a case of Too Much Sensory Stimulation. And, my difficulty in organizing my torrent of thoughts is eclipsed only by my difficulty in organizing my apartment.

Perhaps it was spending time with Christi that inspired this relapse of Ruby-In-Paradise syndrome: the feeling of pleasure with what I have, yet complete incomprehension of how and when I decided what it was that I wanted.

It is not unlike the approach of 4 month-year-old Isaac to the world: limitless things to look at and constant decisions to make, all of them never seen or decided before. Options spring not from experience but imagination, and random guesswork presents as good a strategy as any.

It's funny how the cards fall; some of it is probably in the tossing; other parts, the wind. At the same time that I do almost always feel lucky, short-lived tastes of the life of another, the snowmobiles, mountains and picnics in campers, the beaches, big dogs, fireplaces and wall-sized windows, transform tentative contentment into tangible approach-approach conflict.

Still, passing distracting epiphanies be damned,
(and discomforting punctures whose repair often strengthens the armor)

it seems best to look forward, and not to look back.

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thanks, Top25.org

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Palm Pilot's in the bag while Pixar Parties Hard
What AOL gets from Netscape
COMDEX! Schwag AND Meeting Bill AND PLUS Parting is Such Sweet Sorrow!
7 Questions, Answered
Silicon Spin.
references
join rebecalist
read more.

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today